{#2} “Should Not Have Answered” Jan. 4, 2015 ©

The first time you called me
I answered
I was sitting in this exact spot
Only God knows
How much I want or need you to call me now
That’s just not ever going to happen again
You were with her last night
Long before me
She held your heart
Never stood a chance
Did I?
I didn’t know about her
That wasn’t fair
I would have set up barbed wire
Around my heart
To keep you away


My guard was down
What the fuck was I thinking?
I wasn’t
I’m shattered
Trying to pull myself together
All the while you’re holding her
Loving her
Kissing her
You are “Truly In Love” with her

I am sitting in the exact same spot
As the first time you called me
I should not have answered


“False Reality” Sept. 15, 2014 ©

It is my false reality
Who are you to enter my life
At my expense
You are toying with my emotions 
Destroying everything inside of me


Dear God,
What is or was the purpose of this?
Am I to cry the rest of my life?
All of eternity?
He does make me feel so much better about myself
He just can’t be a part of my life
It is my imagination 
Building a false reality
He is not real
But he is so real to me
I am falling in love with him
Dear God,
Please help me to understand
Dear Sir,
You entered my life
I’m sorry that I don’t understand 
The worst part is
Not understanding my imagination 
I built this…
“False Reality”


“Our Last Dance” Dec. 21, 2014 6:12 am ©

You took ahold of my hand
Lead me up to the dance floor
Spun me once
I then held on to you
With everything I had
For I knew that it would be
“Our Last Dance”
Holding on to you
I embraced all of my senses
To enjoy only you
I can still feel you
The soft satiny materials of your suit
Your heart beating against mine
The way you held me
Your smell
For I knew that it would be


“Our Last Dance”
I knew that I would never have
A moment like this again
I wanted to remember everything
You are my everything
And I have to let you go now
For the dance is over
It was
“Our Last Dance”

My memory isn’t the best so I try to use all of my senses to suck up all of everything in that moment, in every moment. It’s all gone in a flash….. I can still feel “Our Last Dance” and it is a wonderful memory that no one can take away from me.
I have no idea what song was even playing. It was only the two of us…in my world.

♡Our Last Dance♡

Music…Need I say more?