“The Cruise” Written by Gibbons and Barnard June 8, 2016 ©


Sweat ran down Porky’s snout as he ran, desperately looking for an open door.  He could hear voices and the clatter of heels behind him and he pushed at a door.  This one opened and he carried on in.
He looked around at the faces that had all turned his way and he spun around in time to see the door close.  “Welcome to the party.” The woman smiled.  “Everyone has been waiting for you.”

(YES….KEEP GOING said Fifi.)

Against the side of the room closest to him was a larger roaster.  He could feel the warmth from where he was, but nothing seemed to be cooking.  Porky slowly started to walk backwards, inching his way closer to the door that he had entered through.  Everyone in the room seemed to be moving towards him as he backed away.  Suddenly he could go no further as he knocked against a group of girls stood by a table.  One of the smallest girls was looking straight at him with sheer evil filling her eyes.

There was giggling from behind the stage curtains. Carts of vegetables were being rolled up a ramp in preparation for something quite large.  An elderly man was awaiting the Guest of honour, who just happened to be Mr. Porky himself. A standing ovation bellowed through the room

Suddenly a voice said “Run Porky Run!”


From the next corridor down a captive fairy breaks loose from her chains. She mustn’t let her captors see or hear her. She peeks into the hall of horrors to our trapped piglet.

All faces turned to Tinkerbell as she burst into the room and, with a stroke of her wand, turned them all into vegans.  Suddenly the hunger turned to confusion as the guests wondered what they had been doing.  Slowly they walked out, leaving Porky with his saviour.

Porky breathed a sigh of relief and thanked Tinkerbell.  She smiled at him and said “I only turned them into vegans”

There was a side of Tink that nobody knew

“I never said I was a vegan.”

She walked over to the roaster and made sure it was still on.  Then called over a few of her friends.

Then she turned to the fat little pig.  They all looked at Porky with love and then full food lust….
“Let’s eat!”

Porky squealed then backed away only to find the door locked


Tinkerbell giggled as she rattled her keyring.  “Look what I have.”  She grinned.

Porky almost cried as he realised he had nowhere left to run.
Tink and her friends smiled at him.  “Thank you Porky” said Tink “You’ve been a good little piggy”

“But we’re hungry…”

Porky sat in a corner eating the apples one of the fairies had given him, while they carved his amputated leg for their feast tonight.

(HE LIVES! Said Fifi)


Tink and her friends enjoyed each of the 4 meals, one for each leg, and gave Porky wheels to roll around.

Then came day 5…

By now they had run out of leg roasts and the ship had docked in a secluded bay on a Caribbean island.  The guests on board looked at the beautiful white sand and decided to have a beach party.  They wheeled Porky off to join them and let him enjoy the warm clear sunshine.

Tink smiled at her friends and said “I think we’ve been mean enough now.  Don’t you?”
They nodded and she walked up to Porky and patted him on the back.  “We’re going now.”  She said “So we’re leaving you with these nice people.”

She walked up to the group of cruise guests busily preparing their vegetable BBQ, then looked back at Porky and smiled.  “It doesn’t seem fair that we get to enjoy all that pork.”  She said, turning back and waving her wand.  “You’re no longer vegans.”

All eyes turned to the fat, legless pig as Tink mouthed “sorry” before flying off.


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